Letting Go of Guilt...
There are times as a parent you feel so darn guilty and if you aren't careful, guilt can take over your life.
I feel guilty about wanting to sleep an extra half hour in the morning when the kids come bounding in yelling about breakfast, but recently I have started reminding "me" to give "me" a break (yes I talk to myself sometimes, it's how I convince myself to get out of bed on a cold morning). I'm tired not because I spend the evenings partying while the girls sleep, I'm tired because I'm pregnant with my third child, going to school to receive my masters and maintaining my freelance writing career. It's normal to want more sleep!
If parents aren't careful we will raise our children according to our guilt and not necessarily according to the standards we envision for ourselves and our children. What does parenting with guilt look like? You give an extra cookie because you got dinner on late, you buy another toy because you haven't been home as much as you've wanted to be, you hear "Gimme, Gimme, Gimme!" and you think "Well, I hate to say no because..."
When you parent with guilt you end up questioning your standards and values while crumpling at the slightest resistance which your kids will notice, expect and exploit. So girl, let go of the guilt. We're not perfect and most of the time the kids won't notice!
Examiner.Com
I feel guilty about wanting to sleep an extra half hour in the morning when the kids come bounding in yelling about breakfast, but recently I have started reminding "me" to give "me" a break (yes I talk to myself sometimes, it's how I convince myself to get out of bed on a cold morning). I'm tired not because I spend the evenings partying while the girls sleep, I'm tired because I'm pregnant with my third child, going to school to receive my masters and maintaining my freelance writing career. It's normal to want more sleep!
If parents aren't careful we will raise our children according to our guilt and not necessarily according to the standards we envision for ourselves and our children. What does parenting with guilt look like? You give an extra cookie because you got dinner on late, you buy another toy because you haven't been home as much as you've wanted to be, you hear "Gimme, Gimme, Gimme!" and you think "Well, I hate to say no because..."
When you parent with guilt you end up questioning your standards and values while crumpling at the slightest resistance which your kids will notice, expect and exploit. So girl, let go of the guilt. We're not perfect and most of the time the kids won't notice!
Examiner.Com
Comment
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Comment by Judi on February 5, 2009 at 4:02pm -
we did a whole show on this back in either october or november. It's a very hard thing to let go! http://www.lipsticknlaundry.com/
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Comment by Sharon on February 4, 2009 at 8:49am -
If you listen to your kids, if they know they are loved, if you do little things when you can to make them feel special - they will be happy and adapt to whatever life routine is needed for your survival as a family.
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Comment by tracey lamphere on February 4, 2009 at 6:00am -
It's not the little things like sleeping in that get to me. It's the big picture, especially as a working mom. Am I spending enough time with her, etc. I just have to remind myself that my daughter knows only the world I have given her. She doesn't know that other moms stay home or some families have only one parent. She doesn't have standards or societal norms to refer to. As long as she is happy things are good. I will try to relax.
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Comment by Kid Organizer on February 3, 2009 at 8:09pm -
Guilt about not being home as much as the kids would want me to be. I did just pick up office space in my neighborhood so I can be closer to home.
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