I have come off what could possibly one of the record worst weeks in history!...well, at least in my more recent history. Digging out from the rubble and trying to dust myself off, I've come to see that this past week was hard but also full of lots of reminders about some of life's greatest lessons:
Put Yourself Out There--a friend is moving away sooner than I thought. She's a newer friend, but I'm finding we have a lot in common and that I like her quite a bit. Of course, now that I've gotten over myself and feel more comfortable with her, she's leaving! I had so much time to build that relationship, while she was here, but I was so nervous and insecure about meeting someone new and if she would like me that I didn't jump at the opportunity soon enough.
The Power of Motherhood--I haven't seen anyone as sick as my son was, earlier this week. I've run through emergency situations, in my head, and assumed I'd be a puddle of hysterics, when faced with one. Not so...a deep-set feeling, actually a knowing, of "something being wrong" started in the morning. Once his condition went downhill, a calm came over me...mop up puke, carry to car, drive to emergency room, carry into ER, complete forms, lay him down, watch IV being inserted. The fragility of life...of his life...being fought for through sheer force of will from every fiber of my being. He stayed close to me like he knew I had laid out a protective cocoon of love for him. It was an almost primal experience.
There Is Just Today--a friend of mine passed suddenly. I had been meaning to take him to lunch and get caught up, but I have been so very busy that I put it off, thinking, "I'll get to it tomorrow or next week". He died, before I had the chance. Time just slips away so quickly, when you're busy in your life. I know he would understand...that he knew I was all over the place...but was there a moment I could've taken the time but chose to fill it with something on my to-do list? As I stood at his grave, there was such a sense of finality...that there was no more moving forward for him...that this place was the end of his story. It is hard to marry this abrupt stop in his timeline with the continuity of the lives he was a part of.
But, life for the rest of us does goes on, and we should be making the best of it...once it's reached it's end, that really is it. There really is no time like the present to invest in your relationships...to love on your family...to take time for the people in your life...to live in the now...to prioritize your life in a way that makes it full and good for you, because we just get this one shot at having it so...this one chance to laugh, learn, love...to live.