Hi ladies,

 

This is a weird question....but one I am sure some may have pondered during their marriage:

 

Let me know your thoughts on this, as hubby and I are not seeing eye - to - eye, and his solution: take a poll.

 

So here goes:

 

If you are married to someone who is rarely home (over the road truck driver home about 4 days of the month)- and you have texting, home phone, facebook, email, video call...everything under the sun: is it wrong to want/expect (as the wife) to be called or texted 'something' , i.e. Hello.....Good Morning...something? If husband can text...tweet...whathaveyou other people...people not even known personally to him... is it wrong to want to be first along the list ... rather than get a call at the end of the day?

 

Not needing a long drawn out call every morning, as life does occur and take us in different directions- but wanting a "hey just thinking of you"  text or call ....

 

Yup- this is what happens...so here I am posting a poll about it.

Be honest - let me know your thoughts.

 

:) Chelle

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My husband isn't a truck driver, but is a "work-a-holic" and I found myself asking this very question during our first years of marriage. Then it dawned on me that while it would be nice, we are very different: we have different expectations and desires. I also took and few minutes to put myself in my husband's shoes and I asked "What is his way of showing that he loves me?" When I realized that he had many other ways of expressing his care and love, I decided to focus on what he was doing.

At the same time though, I think that you have a right to want a thoughtful message, but he has a right not to want to write one. His lack of messages does not mean that he loves you any less. It doesn't mean that he is cheating, it doesn't mean that he isn't a thoughtful person; in fact, it may just be his personality. Consider his personality type, his work load, and what is going right in your relationship, and then decide if this is a battle you want to fight over. Of course, you may still want him to send little romantic messages, but you should want him to do it willing because a forced message out of guilt is like no message at all.

Try finding something that you want and he is willing to do that will satisfy you both.
Hi Chelle, My husband works away from home and is gone three/ four weeks at a time and then home for one week. We have free long distance between our cell phones and we talk probably three times a day minimum. The calls are usually brief because we talk so often so there is not alot to catch up on but its usually a morning call and then a call later in the day to ask how your day is going and then a evening call to say good night and just share how our day has gone. I don't think you are wrong to expect your husband to text, call or something at least once a day and yes it should be first on his list. Its not hard to send a good morning text. At least you know that he is thinking about you.
Thank you both- Denise and Elle- appreciate the feedback. And the different views.
Denise- I feel the same way- just 'something' to feel connected being so far apart. I feel we lose that connection.
Elle- girl, you have typed what he says, lol almost word for word on the expressing his love/caring in other ways.

:) Thank you ladies - again- love this forum- always get good info - much appreciated -
Have a Happy Holiday

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